Fatigue is a subject about which I am often asked. The chemo med Temodar affects people in different ways. I know folks who had an allergic reaction to Temodar, or had their blood counts drop and therefore had to switch to a different agent, but in my case, I was able to take this med for more than 2 1/2 years non stop with no major adverse impacts. My CBC readings were always favorable, and fatigue was tolerable and in some ways manageable. By the time I reached three years of Temodar, however, my body basically said "enough" and I was hit with nausea and vomiting. Taking Kytril to eliminate the nausea resulted in constipation, including one violent, painful sequence that must never be permitted to occur again. So I stopped the Temodar, and the tumor returned soon there after. Not sure if there is a relationship between halting of Temodar and the recurrance, even though the timing is suggestive of said relationship. You'd think that all tumor cells would have been destroyed after three years of chemo therapy. Probably all of the villians sensitive to Temodar have indeed been killed, so now I am going after the other bad guys via Carboplatin and Avastin. I am taking the prescription laxative Polyethelene Glycol, up to 34 grams per day, to keep my system running. I wish I had known about this medication two years ago.
So the chemo I take can cause fatigue, yet some days my energy level is 100%, other days I am a Zombie and other days bring forth a mix of energy and fatigue. But even when I am somewhat out of it, I am still able to function well at work, and invariably notice during meetings that most of the people in attendance looked waxed themselves, heads nodding up and down trying to stay awake. I am encouraged by their yawns and by a thousand other little events going on around me; people being used by the Lord to provide encouragement and hope to me without their knowledge. So I now conclude that perhaps our best ministry to others is when the left hand does not know what the right hand is doing. That is, we are helping other unawares. Chuck Swindoll says that 75% of helping others is just showing up - being available and approachable.
Another facet to fatigue is Keppra, a med designed to prevent seizures. Keppra aims to mitigate the risk of neuron misfires, but with this benefit comes fatigue, which can leave me in a sleepy state. Taken just prior to bedtime, this is actually a benefit. Taken in the morning as I begin the day, Keppra can hinder my efforts to get started. Staying physically active, even getting up from my chair at work and walking around the building, doing deep knee bends, or using the hand gripper, can get me restarted after just a few minutes. A good, robust meal has the same effect. Then there is decadon, a steroid I took before and in the weeks after surgery. I am given Decadon even today before a Carbo or Avastin injection. Decadon jacks up my system and prevents me from sleeping more than a few hours at a time, which paves the way for drowsiness. Fortunately Decadon wears off after two or three days after its administration, so I return to normal until the next injection.
I have hay fever and allergies during the Spring and Fall that leds to sneezing, blocked nasal passages, soar throat, an upset stomach, low grade headaches and fatigue to varying degrees, which adds to the overall fatigue experienced. Claritin mitigates some of these symptoms.
And so it goes on and on to the point where I have discontinued by overt concern about fatigue in the interest of emotional capital conservation. I just thank the Lord each day that I can get out of bed and go about His business. I often have to look back to see what God has done in my life, and yet there is something happening now, if I will only be quiet, sit down and listen for that still small voice. Being still and quiet is facilitated by fatigue, so I have come full circle on this, to where I now see fatigue as an ally! God specializes in turning things around, upside down, inside out, 1/x (inverting numerator and denominator), defining the undefined, doing a new thing.
